If I am invisible....

What'cha doing tonight?
I wish I could be
A fly on your wall
Are you really alone
You're stealing my dreams
Why can't I dream you into my life?
What would it take to make you see
That I'm alive?

If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invincible
I'd make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
Then I could just tell you where I stand
I would be the smartest man
If I was invisible
Wait--I already am

Saw your face in the crowd
I call out your name
You don't hear a sound
I keep tracing your steps
Each move that you make

Wish I could read
What goes through your mind (oh, baby)
Wish you could touch me
With the colors of your life

I'd make you mine tonight
(Invisible)
I'd make you mine tonight

I reach out
But you don't even see me
Even when I scream out
Baby, you don't hear me
I am nothing without you
Just a shadow passing through

If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invincible
I'd make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
Then I could just tell you where I stand
I would be the smartest man
If I was invisible

I'd make you mine tonight
(If I was invisible)
I'd make you mine tonight
(If I was invisible)...

********************************************

When I was a teenager, I must say that I am the quiet sort. I dun talk much and I dun give a damn bout things around me. I was one of the hearthob (ehem), but I am more quiet in person. I m not the chatty me then. Though I knew all of the students, I am more reserved to ones that I m comfortable with.

After school, we would be chatting at the void deck with a stick of cigarettes bought from the mama shop for 30 cents. One stick per day. On saturday, I would be out with my gerlfren and will be chatting at one the most quieter blocks or date to town. Hmmm.... that was the only exciting thing bout school, other than fights and occasional tea dance.

After 'O' level, I m more mindstream. I mixed with many people and whilst the money last till the next pay date, I would be out at nights enjoying life. I never knew much that such life would be a miserable thing in years to come.

When I started my career as a "security officer", I am more down to earth. I can see bout wat life should be. Life taught me to be kind and to balance the good and bad. I no longer become the reserved person and began to be more boisterous.

At times, I feel like I was put in the limelight when I am not actually seeking it. Deep inside me, I was just the same reserved shy person that I was. In me, I still have that respect for others and at times, I am still being step upon.

But, I've learned to stand tall and defend myself. I've learned that if people can voice out their opinion, why not me? I dun have to give a damn whether my opinion is accepted. All I want is for people to listen to it and make their own decision.

I feel that I am just a contributor and not someone who force anyone to accept things blindly. I wanna be a leader with heart and not one with just brain. I like to set aside things and planned the future in long term wise. Some might say that I am catious, but to me, I am taking precaution in case there is a need for plan B.

I began to think a lot. No matter wat I do, i would began to think wat will happen in years to cum, should I continue doing it. u might call it being mature. All I can see is that now, I got family to think about. I got good frens to consider. I got A, B, C and D to set and loved, not forgetting E, F and G.

Life is full of its ups and downs. If u should fall, retraced back ur steps and try again. Stop being invisible, cos trust me, no one will ever listen to you...