Life's like that...
This post is especially dedicated to the following people.
Zul, Epul, Kahar, Afadz and... myself.
Zul, Epul, Kahar, Afadz and... myself.
As we have spoken guys. This is a topic that all of us is unable to draw a conclusion to. This is also a topic that everyone has their own minds. No one can deny that there are an optimistic way or pessimistic way looking at this point. This post will tell you guys how I actually look at jealousy. I have not checked either one of your entry before this... Pls bear that in mind.
So, here goes...
Jealousy is a complex human emotion that is provoked by a perceived threat to an exclusive dyadic relationship. Although the emotional experience of jealousy may involve varying degrees of sadness, anger, and anxiety, many psychologists have defined it globally as the sense of "distress" or "discomfort" experienced over a partner's real or imagined involvement with another. Jealousy can occur in any type of relationship, but it is most commonly associated with romantic relationships.
Jealous feelings can apply to many types of relationships. There is sibling rivalry where one sibling seems to receive more attention than the other is receiving. Jealousy also exists in the workplace over the achievement of others. The most prevalent jealousy exists in intimate relationships. Think of jealousy as a fire-breathing dragon that lashes out when he or she feels threatened. Jealousy produces bells, sirens and whistles going off, loud enough to wake the jealous dragon. The jealous dragon will no doubt emerge from its dark cave to investigate what the commotion is all about and will react accordingly. You may suspect that your partner is cheating on you or is perhaps entertaining the idea. After close inspection of the situation, the dragon has to determine if this is a false alarm or a true alert.
For instance, you may have witnessed your partner having an innocent conversation with a member of the opposite sex. If you have confidence in yourself and trust that ur relation ship is solid, then you will deem this as a false alarm. This is usually enough to send the dragon back into hibernation. It is only when someone has doubts about themselves or feels that the relationship is a bit shaky, that the act of cheating becomes a real possibility. The jealous dragon then has a tendency to become fully awake.
A true alert indicates that trouble may be brewing for the relationship because someone has left a trail of verifiable clues. Verifiable means you have seen or heard something suspicious with your own eyes or ears. I believe that everyone does experience twinges of jealousy from time to time. For those who are lucky enough to be in a mutually trusting relationship, jealousy lies dormant most of the time. This is especially true if both parties avoid exhibiting behaviors deemed suspicious. Also, in this case both parties make a daily effort to stay connected.
Abnormal jealousy is an emotion resulting in a reaction to unfounded suspicions. It usually takes the form of extreme possessiveness and the need to control your partner every move; even though your mind tells you they are doing nothing wrong. Abnormal jealousy usually stems from a deep-seated fear of rejection and insecurity.
Unfounded jealousy can ruin your life, if it goes unchecked. Because of it, you may push away people you really care about w/out even realizing it. No one enjoys being controlled, manipulated or having to report their every move to you 24/7. Not only is it degrading to the person you are trying to control, but it also indicates what little control you have over yourself. Jealousy eventually takes its toll on everyone involved. It produces mental and physical fatigue, stress and anxiety. Those under your careful watch will soon grow tired of the jealous dragon breathing fire down their neck. All they have to do is look around and observe healthy relationships, working because of mutual trust and respect.
Given the choice, most will choose a healthy trusting relationship over one of constant supervision and jealous reactions of rage and righteous indignation. If you find yourself in jealous situations where your reasons for being jealous are valid and verifiable, you have two choices. You can choose to remain with your cheating partner and work on the relationship together or you can choose to move on. Both choices have their pros and cons and only you can determine which is best for you. In the end, your ultimate goal should be achieving the highest level of love, trust and respect for each other.
To me, it is alright if anyone of the couple has feeling of jealousy. It's perfectly normal. It would be worrying if your partner doesn't. But it has to have its limit in being jealous to your loved ones. I am very sure, that in every normal relationship, jealousy would be minimal, until it came to a point when your partner has betray the trust.
When your trust has been betrayed, a partner will have the inquisitive motion to any of your action. That is when you will have the quesy feeling that your partner is being too possessive and he/she is taking over your life.
The fear of losing someone that you luv is great. To have your trust betrayed is an overwhelming feeling of regret and other mix feelings of hatred, in concoction with many greater fear that wat you have always been having might be missing from you forever. Thus, to still have the person in your life, the only way of showing is by being jealous of him/her. It also means that the trust taht you once had, had diminished.
To regain back the trust is not as simple as saying, " Yes, I've forgive you and let's start all over again." It takes more then just mere words. Proving to your loved ones that her love is an utmost importance and that you have wronged her is a major kindda deal.
A task that was once easy, proving to someone that has her trust betrayed is nothing close to death. Should your loved ones give you a second chance, I think, you should return her love and near with the aftermaths.
Entering a secured place in life is not easy. Especially with a person that is not of your flesh and blood. I wish to state that trust plays an important part to overcome jealousy. If you are bounded by love, then you got to be loyal to elivate your relationship to a cosy den that can only occupy both you and her. When you are there, I bet, jelousy will never be an issue.
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At dead of night, when strangers roam
The streets in search of anyone who’ll take them home
I lie alone, the clock strikes three
And anyone who wanted to could contact me
At dead of night, ’till break of day
Endless thoughts and questions keep me awake
It’s much too late
Where’ve you been?
Who’ve you seen?
You didn’t phone when you said you would!
Do you lie?
Do you try
To keep in touch? you know you could
I’ve tried to see your point of view
But could not hear or see
For jealousyI never knew time passed so slow
I wish I’d never met you, or that I could bear to let you go
At dead of night, ’till break of day
Endless thoughts and questions keep me awake
it's much too late
Where’ve you been?
Who’ve you seen?
You didn’t phone when you said you would!
Do you lie?
Do you try
To keep in touch? you know you could
I’ve tried to see your point of view
But could not hear or see
For jealousy
Where’ve you been?
Who’ve you seen?
You didn’t phone when you said you would!
Do you lie?
Do you tryTo keep in to
uch? you know you could
I’ve tried to see your point of view
But could not hear or see
For jealousy
Where’ve you been?
Who’ve you seen?
You didn’t phone when you said you would!
Do you lie? Do you try
To keep in touch? you know you could
I’ve tried to see your point of view
But could not hear or see
For jealousy
Where’ve you been?
Who’ve you seen?
You didn’t phone when you said you would!
Do you lie?
Do you try
To keep in touch?
you know you could
I’ve tried to see your point of view
But could not hear or see
For jealousy
I never knew ’till I met you
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